Idiot behaviour

I was at 2 parties last night - one was in Clapham and one was in Angel. And I drank a fair bit throughout the night, leaving Angel at just before midnight. And I got home at 2.00, because I got on the wrong bus, twice, and ended up in the wrong part of South London. I ended up getting a cab because I was so lost. That's just flipping stupid behaviour. I also have a cut on my hand and a bruise on my leg, so I surmise that I fell over at some point. What an idiot.

I am meeting Jez from the dating website on Wednesday. I think he's a lawyer, and his emails are pretty funny. So we'll see. I MUST NOT GET DRUNK.

My ex-boyfriend RW rang me today to ask if I would help him with his CV. I reckon he's seen from Facebook that I've lost weight. But there's no way I'm getting back with him. He managed to annoy me within about 5 minutes of being on the phone.

Pokerface

One of my "development areas" (which means weaknesses) at work is that I am too easy to read and I need to develop a pokerface. I think that's a criticism of my personality more than anything, but that's another post.

Anyway, the point is, I spectacularly failed to display a poker face when I went on a work social tonight to the theatre. Now, I like the theatre. I really enjoy going to see plays. Unfortunately what we went to see tonight was "avant-garde theatre" - which I now understand means theatre with no theme, characterisation, understandable dialogue or point. So I walked out. I walked out and left my colleagues in there because I thought it was pretentious bollocks masquerading as art. Someone with a pokerface would have stayed and said "Oh I thought they needed to develop the deconstructive elements more." I just fucking bailed because it was shit. And what annoys me is that tomorrow they'll all poke fun at me. But essentially it's the emperors new clothes. And it was so awful I couldn't bear it. I actually cried with anger on the bus home. There are so many fantastic plays and ideas and actors out there. And I paid £22 for a pile of wank.

Sorted

I have just sorted out my finances. So in addition to my cash ISA for the short term and my pension for the long term I now have a stocks and shares ISA for the medium term. I also have a monthly budget for my disposable income (after food and travel costs), which is £950 per month. I get to spend this on going out, clothes and shoes, toiletries, books and magazines, haircuts, contact lenses plus other people's birthdays etc. That is a lot of money. It's actually more than my first proper monthly salary after tax (in 2000), which was about £900. That's mental.

I do appreciate that I am fortunate to earn a good salary, given that around a third of households in the UK have an annual income of around £16000. I certainly never expected to be earning the amount that I do at my age, and it was never what motivated me. What it has done is enabled me to help out my family, which I am really happy about.

X Factor dramarama

I bloody love X factor. This year's live rounds started last night. I had the girls round for a "winter warmer" - casserole, real baked potatoes and wine (of course). It was a blinder of a show - I particularly loved Olly, Stacey and Joe.

I have had a few nice messages from the men on the dating site, so that's really good.
I went for a swim this afternoon -20 lengths. I want to get back into the gym and lose the few remaining pounds.

I got into a new singer today - her song was on in a shop and I asked who it was. She's called Sarah Blasko and she's Australian. I think she's ace - what do you think?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YnX3zbk6ss

Food glorious food

Brighter day today (thank goodness and thanks for the kind comments). I went to the "skinny jeans workout" at the gym, which involved a lot of lunges. But it was enjoyable nonetheless.

I've also signed up to an online dating site, and hopefully not made myself sound too much of a lunatic. So we'll see what happens.

It's my lovely lovely boss's last day at work tomorrow. I've got a card and I need to think of something fantastic to write in it. I was thinking of a poem but that's probably too poncey.

I'm having a mexian standoff with my crazy horse flatmate over emptying the bin. He takes absolutely no responsibility for living here and I've finally flipped. I sort out all the bills, read the meter, buy the washing up liquid and do the mopping and hoovering. And he does NOTHING. He barely even makes the effort to speak to me unless I make all the running in the conversation. And clearly I haven't got the patience for quiet people, they need to make a flipping effort.

Just breathe

I am really really low today. Something I work on that I am very passionate about has been seriously threatened. Added to that, my face and neck are covered in spots, I've put on 4lbs since New York and I am feeling so hungry all the time that I've been eating crisps like they're about to stop growing potatoes.

It's times like this that I want to crawl into my bed and not get out for a few days. And there have been times in the past when I've done just that. And there was a point today when I left my desk, went outside and cried.

But I know that retreating is not the answer, and I've got to face things head on. So I will pack my gym gear and do some exercise tomorrow, be more careful about what I eat, and get a good night's sleep.

Spend spend spend

It's been a while since I posted on here - no particular reason, just had bits and pieces going on. The work event was an absolute triumph and I got huge praise, (the word used was "stellar") but actually it was the fact that the kids loved it so that made me the happiest.

New York was better than I could have imagined. BARACK OBAMA was staying at our hotel. It was completely insane. I hadn't realised that all the world leaders would be at the United Nations. It was amazing. My parents had a ball, they said it was the best holiday they'd ever had, which was so lovely.

I spent a shedload of money in New York, and I spent a shedload more today. But it's my money, I earned it and I can spend it how I like. I bought (deep breath)

A brown tweed DKNY winter coat
Green leather gloves
A black and green trenchcoat
A green scarf
A green handbag and matching purse
A navy blue shirt dress
A black shirt with a ruffle front
Marc Jacobs Lola perfume (actually my mum bought that for me)
Calvin Klein knickers
Make-up from Sephora
Work-out clothes for the gym

And today I bought
the NICEST irregular choice shoes ever (I'll add a photo if I can figure out how)
A blue silk dress
A red Roland Mouret-esque dress
A new suit for work (grey with pink pin-stripe)
A fuschia silk top.

And I still need to buy winter boots....